intr.v. pan·dered, pan·der·ing, pan·ders
1. To act as a go-between or liaison in sexual intrigues; function as a procurer.
2. To cater to the lower tastes and desires of others or exploit their weaknesses:
I have worked with thousands of clients over the years. Last week I was forced to end a consultation right in the middle of it, offering the client a refund which is something I have never done before in my career. I have refunded a person’s money because they weren’t satisfied with my work once or twice but never, even encountered anything like this before. I just couldn’t get through the consult because the client and I were at cross purposes.
I ended the consultation because I realize the client wanted me to pander. Essentially, I was being paid to agree with and validate her self view AND her opinion of me which was quite low! She’d decided I was a lousy astrologer and basically was now paying me to agree with her.
Now I could have done it. There are all kinds of astrologers who pander, that’s for sure. I could have manipulated and placated her, took the beating she wished to give me (along with her money). I could have set her up to pay me and beat me on a regular basis but it’s just not in my character and so this meltdown occured. But it got me thinking.
Although I have a number of clients I have worked with for years, I do not see what I do as “therapy”. If I was working as a therapist, I think other action would have been appropriate but as it is, forming a therapeutic relationships and allowing people their projections and various other sundries falls outside the paradigm of what I do.
I think it’s important to note this as a boundary or as a limitation or however it may be viewed even though I have only had this problem once and may never have it again. I am definitely not going to pander to clients and I don’t care if I could get rich doing so.
I believe in carving out a niche. My reputation is for candor and keen insight so if you are calling looking for lies and lack of insight, I am definitely not going to be your gal. But I can’t say that another astrologer might not be able to help this gal, or that they might just agree with her read on things. But for me this is a point of integrity. My opinion is not for sale and if I behaved otherwise I am pretty sure I’d put myself right out of business.